Seven Years Bitter Luck

I’m usually pretty terrible at remembering anniversaries, which is why I decided to get married in 2000, so I would always know how many years I’ve been married. It has been pretty foolproof, and the end of summer date is also good, so we can always go on a chill date, while we make fun of our kids for having to go back to school.

The sad thing is that I usually remember the anniversary of my Ben’s Bitter Blog on March 8th, but totally biffed it on Friday. Luckily, you all got a bunch of Gifs to celebrate. It might have been because I didn’t want the celebration to overshadow Captain Marvel or the International Celebration of Women, so I just decided to wait until today to toot my own horn.

So what numbers pop out to you when you think of 7 years of things? I think of bad luck. So apparently you all walked under a ladder, and crossed paths with a black cat 7 years ago, because my blog has been nothing but bitter luck and misery for you all for 7 years. I feel for you, but mostly I feel for me. I’ve been doing all this hard work and none of you have transferred any of your back accounts to my name or given up any of your lottery money winnings to me.

I guess I will have to keep toiling away hoping that someday Rainn Wilson will discover this blog and want to buy it for billions while wanting me to assistant blog manage it. In the meantime, you will just have to watch my Bitter News from the Couch #10 instead as a way to make me bitterly famous.

ARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHH

Bitter 7 Years of Bad Bitterness Ben

The links in this post contain affiliate links, and I will receive a small commission if you make a purchase after clicking on my link.

Target Deal of the Day: Spalding NBA Slam Jam Over-the-Door Black & Gold Edition Basketball Hoop. I may never be a hoops star and make bucket loads of cash, but I will definitely be able to dunk over my son on this hoop. He might be able to dunk over me too, but at least I will get one or two. Try one of these today and feel like an NBA superstar! Only $27.18 to feel like a basketball god!

 

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10 Comments on “Seven Years Bitter Luck

  1. I wonder how much Elon Musk has to pay people to convince them to work for his Boring Company? Would it be enough for you to quit working for the exciting Bitter Entertainment Network?

    Like

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