Unnecessary Jobs

Quick, activate good husband mode! 

 

Several years ago, I was up late playing my favorite video game, and my wife was trying to sleep. She woke suddenly and complained about really painful heartburn. Usually, she takes a Tums and feels better afterward. But for some reason, that wasn’t working, and she was complaining about intense pain that wasn’t going away. I begrudging turned on good husband mode and paused the game for a second. I went into the bathroom and asked her if she was alright. Do you need to go to the emergency room?

She was like YES, I can’t take this anymore. So against all my safe driving instincts, I drove her to the hospital as if she was having a baby, which we came to find out wasn’t, but pretty close to it. It was her gall bladder and she needed to get surgery to remove it.

For some reason, humans have these body parts they don’t actually need to survive. Actually, we have quite a few. There are the truly unnecessary ones like the gall bladder, the appendix, and tonsils. Then there are other things that while inconvenient, you can live without too. Things like fingers, arms, legs, and hair(I know all too well about this one). Somethings you just can’t live without like brain, heart, (lungs maybe?) and a few other vital ones.

Society is the same way. There are some jobs that are so vital that if we didn’t have them society just wouldn’t survive. Doctors keep us alive longer. The presence of police officers keeps societies from complete anarchy. Some government is important for defense and economy. Teachers educate us so we can learn enough to get jobs and such.

The other day I had to fax something to the state, and since we don’t have a fax machine in our house, we went to our local Workforce services to do so. What I found was an almost comical situation which made me think we could eliminate some government spending.

I’m just looking, thanks.

As soon as I walked into the center, I was greeted by a gentleman that asked me what I could help them with. You know, much like an employee at a clothes store. Not 100% necessary, but if I had a more difficult question, he could probably at least find me an answer or someone else that could help me.

The comical part was when I told him what I needed to do. “I just need to fax something to the state.” About two feet away from me was not one but two fax machines that I could use to fax the papers. As a fairly educated person and with 15 years or more of experience using such complicated machines as faxes, I could almost certainly figure out how to fax things on my own.

That wasn’t needed though, because both fax machines were manned by adult male people, who I assume had their job to help do. Since I had two documents going to two different fax numbers, I had two competent fax-sending-trained dudes help me fax two documents.

Two people fighting over the chance to fax something for me. 

I often wonder how people in finance and computer, and marketing and middle management can get laid off for only doing 18 hours of work in an 8 hour period, but somehow two guys whose government jobs are to help people fax things stay comfortably employed with our tax dollars.

Clearly, life doesn’t make any sense.

What are some jobs you have seen that seem amazingly unnecessary? What are some body parts you could probably do without?

ARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH

Bitter Unnecessary Ben

 

Target Deal of the Day: Beach Babe Comforter Set. Talk about unnecessary things. Comforters on top of blankets on top of sheets. But if you must have these comforters that keep you warm at night and fashionable during the day, might as well get them on sale at Target. They are 20% off for only $79.99, regularly $99.99. Stay unnecessarily warm tonight!

 

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8 Comments on “Unnecessary Jobs

  1. Glad you got your wife to the hospital in time. As for me? I have most of the parts I was born with… tonsils, appendix, gall bladder even my wisdom teeth.
    The only thing I lost was my uterus and to be honest, I wasn’t sorry to see it go!
    😉

    Like

  2. I once knew a guy in a government job whose only job was to click a few buttons to send out a bunch of emails for people in other departments. Never mind that there’s tons of software out there to help people to click a few buttons and send out their own emails, which would be way cheaper than what the government was paying for this guy to do it for them. *Shrugs* I don’t get it. 😉

    Like

  3. Thera are still functioning fax machines that communicate with other functioning fax machines? That seems unnecessary.

    I just wrote yesterday about how superfluous a stripper in a nudist colony would be. That’s probably not a thing, though.

    Like

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